baby Archives | Bad Days Better

by Josh Monda | Dec 11, 2013 | Uncategorized

It was 4am when the phone rang.  As I picked it up my wife was on the other end and she told me her water broke.  Our first child was a fast labor so I woke up my daughter and we headed off to the hospital.  And about 2 hours later Micah John Monda was born.  he was born at 6:17 am and my was at 33 weeks 3 days.  Micah weighed in at 4lbs. 9 1/2 ounce and was 17 1/4 inches long.  My daughter has prayed, and prayed, and prayed for this moment.  Her faith was always so strong believing God would give her a brother or sister.  It took  wife and I over 6 years to have this child and God poured out his blessing on us.

 Its interesting to see how God has brought blessing, after blessing into our lives.  I have been blown away.  Well I could right alot more but to be honest I need some rest and tomorrow I have alot of work to do.  Here is a picture.

I am really tired.  It has all hit me at once. I guess between dealing with my resignation, traveling back and forth to the hospital multiple times, gearing up to move, deciding whether to wait or jump back into ministry, it is just wearing me down.  

Friday my wife will be induced and will give birth to our son Micah John Monda.  Her pregnancy will be at 34 weeks so he will have to spend some time in the NICU.  In addition to that my mother will be here on that same day with one of my friends, and my niece and nephew.  So while my wife is in labor I have to somehow get my mom to the hospital, and I have to pick up the moving truck that day.  In addition to that Saturday it will be time to pack so we have to get the truck loaded and off to Missouri.  Then I have to decide whether to drive to Missouri and fly back to get my wife or do I stay here.  These are decision are weighing heavy on me and so is everything else.  Sorry for the rant.  Pray for strength right now I feel I have little but when we are weak He is strong.

forgiving Archives | Bad Days Better

by Josh Monda | Dec 11, 2013 | Uncategorized

As  I watched this testimony I could not help feel how powerful this testimony is not only to the grace of God but also the saving work of Jesus Christ.

Yesterday was a busy day for me.  I spent the day seeing patients for the first time and spent the day with several people.  I had a good day it was fun to spend time with some people yet at the same time difficult knowing that these people are in the last days of their lives. 

I enjoyed my time with one patient in particular.  We took time to look at an old car magazine together and I read to him about some of the cars.  We looked at the prices of some of the cars when they first came out and I shared with him what the horsepower was.  Even though he could not speak well enough fro me to understand him I could see in his expression and in his eyes that he liked the fact that I took the time to be with him.  It saddened me to know that perhaps this guy had a very little interaction with men now that he was in a nursing home and more then likely he was lonely and wanted a man to just show some interest in him and who he was.  I knew he liked cars because he had a picture of an old car hanging on his board.  My time with him was valuable.

However, this got me to thinking.  What would it be like to talk to someone and to know that they can not understand you.  I know his mind works but it must be difficult to know you can not communicate in a way that people understand you.  For some reason my thoughts turned to forgiveness.  What would it be like to want to say to someone “I forgive you yet not be able to”.  How difficult that must be.

My thoughts have turned to my father.  My father was alcoholic and that is really all I knew him as.  In fact it was a rare moment that my father was sober.  I remember the yelling and the screaming I remember the violent way he behaved when he was drunk.  I could not stand it.  I wanted an escape a way out.  Eventually my mother and father were divorced and I rarely saw my dad.  It got to the point where I never say him and in fact did not even know where he was.  I remember when my dad first found where I was and I m in that first letter he wrote and asked if I would ever be able to forgive him.  My response was “dad I forgave you long ago”  It was barely a year later that my father was murdered on the street of Arizona for a measly 11 dollars.  But what if I had never had the opportunity to tell him I forgave him and what I he never had the opportunity to ask.

This has been on my mind.  Forgiveness can be a powerful thing and I am so thankful that I have been forgiven by Jesus Christ.  I am so thankful for the grace that is experienced through the blood of Jesus Christ.  It took me a long time to get to the point where have forgiven some in my old congregation and how things were handled.  In fact if I am honest bitterness began to take root in me.  Do I agree with how things were handled?  The answer is a resounding no.  Do I forgive how things were handled the answer is yes.  I did not want to forgive but God began to break me and I got to the point where I knew without forgiveness my life would eventually be useless in the hands of the potter.  Now perhaps there are those that think they have done nothing wrong but regardless of the fact I forgive, and have forgiven those that have hurt me.  I pray God’s grace may abound.

I also know that in my life I am not so naive to think that I do not need forgiveness.  I know I have screwed up many times and many times my errors have hurt others maybe those I have hurt will forgive me.  This I know without forgiveness we are not following Christ.  It would be a terrible thing to want to tell someone you forgive them and not be able to say a thing.  

Tomorrow I will spend some time with a man that will most likely be dead very soon I am responsible for his spiritual care.  What would it be like to pass away without forgiving I pray I never know.

love Archives | Bad Days Better

by Josh Monda | Dec 11, 2013 | Uncategorized

Well tonight we had family thanksgiving with my wifes side of the family it really was some good food.  In fact I had some great cranberry relish and some good potatoe stuffing.  As usual I washed it down with my wife’s pecan pie.  I am biased and I know it but my wife males the best pecan pie in the world.      We had a lot of folks here at the ridgeway Baptist church but as I sat hear I was thinking about family and how we are all different.  I am glad that my wife’s family is not the same as my family how boring would life be if we were all the same.  I know for me life would be boring. 

     If I am really honest I use to jot want to come to these things with my wife.  Deep down inside I guess I never really felt welcome but I would always cone to make my wife happy.  I know how lame I am but it is the truth.  Now for the most part I like to come.  But I can’t help but wonder if this is how so many feel coming to our churches.  Do they come in the door looking to be accepted and loved into a family but in the end they feel rejected and not part of the family at all.  I think we are failing miserably in the church and when we stop making church less about our comforts.and more about loving God and loving others we will see Him move.  Lets together change the atmosphere of how we do church.

I read a book that changed my life.  It changed how I look at things and how I do things and how I think.  It was call “The heart of the Problem”  below is kind of some thoughts.

I am not sure why it is so hard for us to say we are sorry or to simply ask for forgiveness.  I am assuming it really boils down to pride and for whatever reason our fear.  We never want to admit that perhaps we said something wrong or did something wrong.  We don’t want to admit that perhaps we handled something wrong or that perhaps we should have our could have handled things differently.  We don’t want to admit that perhaps we had a bad attitude, or a wrong attitude, or a critical spirit when we should not have.  Why?  Why do we carry around strange feeling for other people.  Why do we want that baggage with us.  Why do we sit and wonder what others are thinking about us or whether they think about us at all.  Why are we so willing to harbor bitterness or to deny that we are at fault in anything.

To many times Christians have broken relationships and for whatever reason we think it is ok or that it will just go away.  I find nowhere in scripture that it is just ok.  I can not find anywhere where if we have offended our brother or sister that the best way we handle it is to do nothing.  I also do not find anywhere in scripture that if we have offended another or sinned against them and they ask for forgiveness that we can just assume that we have no responsibility.

The world looks at us as Christians and the very thing that we are to show them we lack.  We lack the desire to truly forgive, we lack the desire to love our neighbor as ourself, we lack the desire to ask for forgiveness.  Really we lack humility and somehow we gloss over it and we think that it is all ok.  Well it is not all ok.  It is sin and there is no human remedy for it.  It will not just fix itself.

I am sure there are people that dont like me much and I am sure there are those that are holding a grudge against me or even are bitter towards me.  I wish I knew who they were I wish they would be brave enough just to tell me so I could say I am sorry so I could ask for forgiveness, so restoration could take place.  So they could deal with any sin of bitterness or anger they have towards me, and so we could display to a world that is looking for christians to be real could see what Christianity is truly about.

So if you are reading this and I have offended you or you are angry at me or bitter towards me for some reason.  Wherever you are, whatever your thoughts I would ask for your forgiveness and say I am sorry for anything that I have done that may have caused harm.

The phone rang at about 7:35 this morning and my wife woke me up and said it was a school wanting me to sub.  As I answered the phone and was asked if I could come in an sub this morning I agreed and then asked what class i was subbing for.  The response Kindergarden.  I have greatly enjoyed my time in the classroom and my time substitute however I have not subbed for elementary in a long time much less I have never subbed for Kindergarden.  Suddenly I had vision of the Movie Kindergarden cop and I wondered how in the world will I deal with 21 Kindergardeners.  

I arrived to the classroom and immediately had two teachers helping me out and showing me the ropes.  A day that I thought might turn out to be a day that I definitely would loose my last few hairs turned out to be a day that was awesome and a day that God used to teach me more about acceptance than anything.  I walked into the class with some preconceived ideas but I left with not only a greater appreciation for Kindergarden teachers everywhere but with a realization of how we can influence such young children.

Granted my day was filled with alot of tattle tailing, whining, and crying but that is not what the day was about.  The day was bout the kids that accepted me as their substitute and how they listened and most of all about all of the hugs I received from these little children and how they would tell me how much they liked me and even tell me they loved me.  Now we might say that is just the way these kids are but in them I saw Gods wonderful creation today.  I could not help but wonder what if we accepted others the same way these children accepted me.  What if we hugged on one another and let others know we loved them and we really did care about them.  What if we took the time to love on those that we barely even our acquaintances.  many times in the church we find it difficult to love those we know well this way much less those we barley know.  What would it look like if we only learned from these little kindergarden students.  I wonder.

The other day I was in talking with two pastors.  After about 30 minutes or so we broke the conversation off and the other Pastor asked if I would talk with him in his office.  I took him up on the offer.  We discussed many different things during that time but what impressed on me the most was his desire to meet with me consistently.  This pastor really did not know me he knew about me but did not know me yet he asked if I would be willing to allow him to hold me accountable.  This impressed me because often times I have wanted this type of a relationship or even mentoring but rarely have people had the time or desire to do so.  I am excited to see what God is going to do in this relationship.

My first assignment was to pick out a book of his.  I selected “The Bruised Reed” which is part of the Puritan Paperbacks.  In the first chapter I found it quite interesting that we must be bruised before we come to Christ which calls us to cry out for His mercy.  However after conversion we still need bruising because of the pride in our nature.  

I reflect on the times I often need bruising how often I led pride stand in the way.  These are the times that I am thinking more highly of myself than I should.  These are the times I experience a bruising.  When I was younger my stepfather would spank me so hard that my bottom would be left bruised.  He did this because i would not cry.  I would not forget those spanking and remember them to this day.  Sometimes God has to give me spanking bruise me so I can see myself for who I really am.  

The second part of my assignment was to read Hebrews 13.  Verse 1 says Let “love of the brethren continue.”   This is one of the marks of Christian conduct.  ”brotherly love”.  Believers are supposed to have a special kind of love it is a brotherly love.  The greek word for “brethren” is (adelphos) which means from the same womb.  The Greek word for love is (phileo) which means deep seated affection or care.  People that have this kind of love come from the same womb or in this case the same source they have been born again.  This is the kind of love we are called to display as Christians.

I saw this type of love displayed recently in a church.  It is hard to believe I saw this take place in a business meeting of all places.  You see earlier that day the Youth Pastor had announced his resignation.  He had been at the church for 2 years.  At the business meeting it was recommended that they gave him 6 months severance and a full year of insurance.  This nearly brought tears to me eyes.  When I talked with one of the Pastors he said it is what we had to do it was the right thing.  Brotherly love was indeed displayed.

I pray that one opportunity arrises I will display that brotherly love that is discussed here in Hebrews 13.

Many times I feel one of the greatest failures in Christian live is our inability to love one another.  In addition it is also our inability to show the world that we love one another.  We all know the verse right  ”By this all men will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another” (John 13:35).  I know alot of Christians that say they love one another.  I mean that is an easy thing to say right “I love you” well it might be easier for some then others.  The reality of it is we do not have to work that heard many times to tell someone we love them.  We hear it from Christians all the time “I love you in the Lord”  not sure why we need to add in the Lord, but we say that.  I think it has become all to common place to say it and not really show it.  

I often think of this when someone is hurting and I hear someone say “they love the person” and often I want to ask “really how are you showing it”.   Why do we get caught into this trap of saying we love others but not displaying that love.  I am so often reminded of

James 2:15-16 If a brother or sister is without clothing and in need of daily food, and one of you says to them, “Go in peace, be warmed and be filled,” and yet you do not give them what is necessary for their body, what use is that?

Sure we may not do something that seems so drastic but we do this very thing all the time.  We know someone hurting or in need and we know we are called to show love but instead we make excuse.

This verse has been on my mind lately “Above all, keep fervent in your love for one another, because love covers a multitude of sins” (1 Peter 4:8)

This verse very plainly and clearly ells us to have a “fervent” love for one another.  The word for fervent ther is (eketenes) which is an athletic word.  It means to stretch and to reach out; to strain and exert to the utmost degree just like an athlete in a race.  This is telling us to be passionate about loving our brothers and sisters in Christ.  This is not just some warm fuzzy feeling that we often have or that we say to one another it goes beyond that.  It is more then just even having some sentimental or caring feeling for another person.  

This verse is commanding us to love with this great love this love of fervency.  But here is what is even greater the verse says “above all” this love is to be put in front of anything else.  This is the most important duty of a believer in Jesus Christ.  We are to put every once of energy in our minds and hearts to love.  This means that we love others even when they have hurt us, or abuse us, or persecute us, or oppose us, or ridicule us, or speak bad about us, or injure us, or make fun of us.  We choose to love regardless of circumstances.

You know what the greatest part about all of this is.  When we love each other with this fervent love “it covers a multitude of sins.” Wow only if Christians to grasp on to this.  Only if we could understand what it means to love in this way. what does it mean?

1. It means that we are not saying we love and at the same time hating, and reacting, and sinning.
2. it means that we are loving with a spirit of forgiveness, not living with some sort of sinful unforgiving spirit.
3. It means that this kind of love will help us to reach those who do evil to us and win them to Christ.  

I pray I will love like this love with a fervent love instead of the typical love I see christians proclaiming.

 

 

 

friendship Archives | Bad Days Better

by Josh Monda | Dec 11, 2013 | Uncategorized

When I was just a boy I remember reading this poem by Helen Steiner Rice.

Friendship is a priceless gift That can’t be bought or sold, But its value is far greater Than a mountain made of gold. For gold is cold and lifeless, It cannot see nor hear, And in your times of trouble, It is powerless to cheer.

It has no ears to listen, No heart to understand. It cannot bring you comfort

Or reach out a helping hand.

So when you ask God for a gift, Be thankful that he sends, Not diamonds, pearls, or riches,

But the love of a real, true friend.

If my memory serves me correct I was at my aunts house and read those words and they have stuck with me ever since.  I have found in my life that some people obviously value friendship far greater than others.  I believe there are those that actually understand friendship and those that do not.  I have been thinking about this alot lately and am not sure why God has placed this so heavily on my heart.  I do know this I thankful for some great friends.  Some I have had for a very long time and some are new friends that I have made.

You know actually the Bible has alot to say about friendship.  For instance I love Proverbs 17:17 when it says “A Friend loves at all times”  friends really do love no matter what.  It does not matter your social statues, wealth, or anything else.  A true friend stand beside you not matter the circumstances.  I have found in my own life it is during those tough times that you find out who your true friends are.

Proverbs 17:9 reads “Whoever covers an offense seeks love,”  This is a real friend.  Some people are constantly looking for whats wrong.  Continually trying to find fault in you they was to judge and criticize in fact that is the first place they often go.  I believe that a true friend helps you be the best you can be.  Friends that d0 not do this really are not friends at all.  I know this is just aspects of friendship and God’s word has so much more to say but when I think of that poem from Helen Steiner Rice friendship really is a priceless gift.

A true friend is hard to find.

This Sunday we were looking at the life of Jonathan a little bit in our small groups.  As we talked about Jonathan and David’s relationship we all agreed that indeed Jonathan was real friend and we discussed a little bit about what is a real friend.

I know that in my life I have had many people that have said they were my friend but when push came to shove in reality instead of showing me friendship I was shown a boot in my seat.  It comes easy to tell people we are their friend but unfortunately words mean little and actions mean so much.  When adversity strikes and troublesome times come you begin to see who really is your friend and who in reality may have pretended to be your friend for whatever reason.

When we looked at the life of Jonathan and we saw loyalty, trust, love, and Jonathan’s unswerving ability to stand with David no matter what the cost.  I see in Jonathan what I would love to have in any friend.  Unfortunately a friend like Jonathan seems rare.  What causes people to look you in the face and tell you they love you but then to give you the boot and forget all about you.  Unfortunately I had to go through some of the most difficult times of my life without some that said they were my friends.  I am unsure what causes people to say they are your friend and yet during those times when you need a friend the most they do not call, they do not email, they do not really do anything.  How unfortunate it is when our friendships are based on feeling instead of on God.  How unfortunate it is when instead of loving our friends we disown them, as if they are some piece of garbage that we really know longer need.

I am so thankful for those that have been just like a Jonathan to me, they know who they are and I am also thankful for those that I have had the opportunity to be a Jonathan to.  So do you have real friends?  You know the ones that are like Jonathan who will stay by your side through it all.

God's will Archives | Bad Days Better

by Josh Monda | Dec 11, 2013 | Uncategorized

It has been awhile since I have put up a post on this site.  Has life been busy?  Absolutely with taking on a new roll as the interim Children’s Pastor and at the same time trying to find a full time pastorate it had been some busy times.  One of the reason why I wanted to take a few minutes and right this post stems from a book I recently read.  The title of the book is “Just Do Something” by Kevin DeYoung.

The premise of the book is how we overspiritualize alot of decisions that come into our lives wondering whether or not it is truly God will or not.  The book is a great fast read and for me really changed the way I look at many decisions not only in the church but in my life as well.  We tend to get so caught up in this idea of whether or not it is God’s will for us to be in a particular ministry instead of just realizing it is God’s will for us to serve.  God wants us involved in the church.

Often times we use God’s will as an excuse to simply sit on the sideline and to never enter the game.  In essence we are abusing our relationship with Christ and twisting God’s word around to suit our needs.  How is it right for us to blame God for not entering a ministry.  Many times we say “well it was not God’s will”  when in reality we just did not want to do it.  I often wish we would just get in the game.

I know over these past few months in my life I could no longer be content to just sit God wanted me to get off the bench and get busy.  You know it does not even matter what it is God wants me involved in the livelihood of his church.  God want me to be busy about His kingdom and when I refuse to do so I am selfish and filled with pride because in the reality of it all I am merely looking out only for my interest.  So if you are reading this Get of the bench and Get in the game.

Well we found out few days ago that my wife had to go on bed rest.  I knew something was wrong when the we got to the hospital and the nurse was checking everything out and said this is not good we have to admit you.  So after what was the second stay in the hospital and with Micah John at almost 31 weeks the Dr. said no activity you need to rest.   No big deal right.  Wrong this turns out to be huge deal.

The plan for us was to move on the 23rd of this month to MO that is now 3 weeks away and I am so in trouble.  My wife and I kind of motivate each other and to be honest there are days I don’t want to do anything but there is so much to do.  It is so overwhelming.  I actually have alot done and maybe I am over exaggerating but it seems like so much to do by myself.  What is awesome is that some of the ladies from the church have set it up for us to have meals all week long that is so great.  I mean I like to cook but to cook, clean, pack, take care of Sarai it is alot.  Now I know how my wife feels.  

Ok so what makes it even harder is if my wife does not have the Micah before we leave then obviously we cant leave and if she does have him before we leave then we probably cant leave.  Crazy I pray God why would you be keeping me here longer there is a reason I pray He will show me.  Anyway so we will be sending everything well most everything we own to Missouri on Memorial Day weekend and Tzigane and I will head to Missouri with Micah later.  Well at least that is the plan for now.

Another thing moving is stinking expensive.  I mean to rent a truck it is nearly 900 bucks plus our gas ouch.  Plus our other vehicles that is not cheap.  In addition my lease is for one year which is until July ouch again.  

Well if you read this blog it is just kind of an update on things that are going on in my life which is no big deal ha.  

Keep praying for Micah John Monda he is now almost 32 weeks.  Pray for my wife because I pretty much keep her in bed all day.  Pray that god will give us direction.

In this blog I am going to talk about two things we say in relationship to prayer that are really kind of goofy.

 

I am sure that you have heard this one before. “This was bathed in prayer” What does this statement mean?  I am convinced that this has become a blanket statement for Christian to cover up either stupid decisions or things they do not want to explain.  We use this statement almost to say well I prayed about it so it has to be right.  It like saying I robbed a convenience store but it was bathed in prayer, I gossiped about my brother or sister but it was bathed in prayer, I made a decision that had a terrible effect on someone but it was bathed in prayer.  I mean come on what a load of crap.  Can we really say this just to cover up our ignorance?

This statement is also filled with arrogance.  I mean when we tell someone this what are we saying to them.  ”I am more spiritual because I bathed this in prayer” we are making an assumption that the other person did not pray at all about the circumstance.  Not only that if they did pray and they heard something different then us then they must not have been hearing from God after all we bathed our decision in prayer.  Is it at all possible that we can actually pray about something and still make the wrong decision well absolutely (of course I suppose this all depends on to what degree you take predestination to).  I have seen so many people that have prayed about something and then still turn around and make a totally ignorant decision.  Of course it is because people pray out of Gods will all the time.  

Might I suggest the next time you go to say this statement maybe stop and think about it.  Why are you saying it?

I want to address one other thing I know this is a long blog.  It drives me absolutely crazy when someone prays and tells you what Gods will is for your life.  For whatever reason God has revealed all of this about your life to another person rather than to you.  I know that this can happen but if someone is walking with the Lord and praying and taking with the Lord don’t you think the Lord would speak to them.  It is so arrogant to tell someone that God has revealed something to you about their life.  Here could be a statement “well I bathed this in prayer and asked God what He wanted to show you and this is what He said”.  Wow what an ignorant and arrogant thing to say.  God for some reason told me what He wanted you to learn?  So now I am assuming that you are not walking close enough to God to hear his voice so I will tell you what He wants to say.  Do I think you call someone in sin?  Yes, do I pray for others and intercede for them?  yes 

Its like going up to someone and saying God told me that you were supposed to start a prison ministry.  Well why wouldn’t God tell that person?  Or God told me that you needed to do this well why would God tell that person.  Especially if they are growing in the Lord.  Some of the things we do in the name of prayer and in the name of Christ blow me away.  I am sure I do worse this is it for now.

 

Pregnancy Archives | Bad Days Better

by Josh Monda | Dec 11, 2013 | Uncategorized

Last-night on “Hannity and Colmes” Gianna Jessen shared some of her story.  If Obama was president at her birth she would be dead.  She handles herself well.  Check out the video.  This issue is going to heat up in this election especially with the fact that Sarah Palin’s baby Trig being born with Down Syndrome.  It is estimated that between 80 and 90 percent of all pregnancies diagnosed with Down Syndrome are murdered.  Watch the video below.

Wow these last few days have been extremely crazy for me.  It all started yesterday.  My wife said she was having alot more contractions and our baby is at 32 weeks in addition she said she had not felt the baby move for awhile.  So I told her it was better to be safe then sorry and to call the dr.   She took my advice and the dr. sent us to hospital to get it checked out.  This was our 5th trip to the hospital during this pregnancy.  While there the nurse ran some tests and said that her water had broke and she was admitted.  We both thought that id were water had broke then our child would be born that night.  We were obviously wrong.  

So I spent the night in an uncomfortable chair and got about 3 hours of sleep before coming home showering and heading back to the hospital.  When I got back to the hospital we received good news.  The nurse said that another test was negative and that her water may not have broke so if she got three negatives she would be allowed to come home tonight.  However, you guessed it the next two showed signs that her water may have broke.  Confused?  Me too.  So they decided to keep her.  Not sure how long maybe until the baby is born we do not know.  

So in the middle of this I received a phone call from a Pastor who had been in contact with me about the possibility of becoming their Youth Pastor.  The kicker is everything with this church at the moment is matching up perfectly.  Well other then it will be 1,000 miles from our family still.  But everything else is perfect it is almost too good.  New building, in a place I have always wanted to live, more of a rural setting, Is this from the Lord?  God please make it known to me.  

In addition to all this my mom will be here next Friday and I have so much to get done for the move.  The plan is to send everything back to Missouri but my wife may still be in the Hospital?  This is crazy.  If you got some advice give it.

Sorry for the rambling just needed to say something.